Stuipid me.
I really really don't know what should I write, do you know? I guess not.
But I think I have to write something here, to avoid I forget it.
Only one thing I wrote the Plurk and Facebook but I didn't wirte here, that I got a case to design website.
Well, but I think it's similar to design blog with CSS, though I don't have the experiences of this aspect; just to try it, I always say.
And... That's all.
我真的覺得我該打一些什麼之類的來紓解一下快要爆炸的想法。
真的很怪，明明人的所有思想活動都是透過大腦去下達指令或者各個腦區之間透過神經結來溝通訊息之類的。
但就是覺得胸很悶，悶到我幾乎想罵人了，耐性盡失。
不過或許很早之前就沒耐性了也不一定，不過我感覺得出來我越來越難笑，不對，某些點我還是可以笑出來；但更多時候我沉浸在自己的世界裡，一個出不去的單向通道的世界裡。
我質疑過一切，也都給過自己合理的答案或者直接丟了就走，反正睡醒在處哩，沒睡醒就等下輩子再談。
但我質疑過的一切事物裡面，一個問題，只有那個問題我給了自己非常肯定的答案，而且是非常負面的答案。
「未來？」「我看不到。」
簡單易懂，看不到就是看不到，他媽的我覺得我的未來就像一塊揉了好幾種顏色最後變得灰灰的黏土，懂嗎？
夢想什麼的我還有，所以對我來說我覺得自己就像個白癡，既然對自己說自己沒有未來可以看見，那夢想是做什麼的？安慰自己不要灰心沮喪？
我只想說腦包，我八成是腦包。
媽的我當了好幾年什麼也不做然後平穩的混上去的學歷，然後現在我又想繼續這樣，只是帶了點小小的，根本渺茫又或者真的摸得到的夢想再往前，或者簡單說是改變。
聽起來我似乎好多的樣子，鬼扯蛋。
我知道過度負面的思想解讀是不對的，但他媽的我就是沒辦法，是想他用奇怪的口頭禪回答一切，雖然你覺得可能是各人習慣或者是想是著讓自己看起來親切一點。
但在我眼裡就是挑釁，雖然似乎一視同仁的都這麼說，看我就是覺得我是唯一被屏除在外的白癡。
我的存在是什麼？體驗這他媽的的世界，了解夢想的偉大，當一個鴨子被田塞一堆有的沒的知識，感受社會到底是他媽的在黑暗什麼，還有自己狗屎般的也失去了最原先的誠懇而假惺惺的配合著回答。
Fucking asshole!
所以說到底我最無法接受的並不是假惺惺的人，這個黑暗的社會，他媽的狗屁政策或者教育政策，而是我自己，我他媽的沒辦法接受我自己的想法。
我試著對自己講裡一百次，或者一千一萬次，然後我做了什麼？坐在這裡抱怨自己的愚蠢。然後繼續無聊的每一天。
我能給自己做些什麼？
乾脆就了結自己之類的哈哈？帶著滿滿無法實現的夢想到另一個世界做春夢去吧！
人類真的很賤，你不給他事情做，他就會東想西想然後猜疑。
看來我真的是他媽的太優閒了才有這種美國時間抱怨一切的愚蠢。
我煩了，我厭了，我只想一個人。
套句話說，就是綠色綜合橘色退色到極致，不聽不看不做想搞消失。
如此而已，什麼鬼屁人生。
雖然我明天大概還是繼續我的人生。
I went to here this afternoon. My mainly goal is teach my friend for "Application Software" B class, I guess.
But now, well, you can find I writing this article. Reasons? I don't know, or might be know a little.
Okay, I just go to here and just write this article. It's kinda a note, not article or dairy. However, I think it is and I know I'll not write over 100 words( gosh! hope it's not over 100?), then I think this article's type is mini diary.
Gosh, I don't know what do I mean. Somebody know?
Now I would write anything in English and just doing my best.
Okay, there are a few things I want to tell you (or simply myself.)
One, one thing I wanna change is design a new theme for my blog. Actually, I don't use the CSS for a long time before I finished my website's lastly design. And I think my CSS skill is simply like a beginner. Seriously. However, at least, I know the tags what I use when I designing... maybe.
Another, I had decided to change my attitude for my lessons of university. Uh, I think I wouldn't give up my interest anyway. Therefore, on this basics, I've to pay more attentions for the lessons, but the one thing need to be noticed! "All plans are made before I find a new job." So if I found a new job, I've to remake my plan.
Another, I wanna finish my novel anyway and seriously. well, according at the second one, I don't need to write this thing because I've to finish not wanna even I dream to finish. Well, I need a note to remind me to finish my novel in anyway. However, I might seldom use this blog. I love to find some problems for myself so much, I guess.
And another, waaaa, congratulations! This is one thing I finally write! I just wanna say something is nothing(what are you talking about?). Oh, I want to, had to, decided to learn my cute finnish! Ahahaha. The author who writes this murmur is crazy. The dear author says" Because it's the end of this article, and The things I wanna tell you( myself), remind myself to do, I've finished it."
Therefore, we can know the only one thing that author wanna says is "I've no idea how to finish this article."
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